Monster Munch: Pickled Onion

A legend of its own really.

Monster Munch occupies a peculiar corner of the snack world. Pure nostalgia clouds everything, which makes it really rather hard to determine if they actually are good.

Certainly even in childhood I remember them operating at the extreme end. Only something the dirtier boys in class would indulge in and the girls would crinkle their little faces in revolt at them.

But, why?

Now obviously these aren’t really crisps in any traditional sense. They’re corn puffs shaped like monster feet, which sounds ridiculous because it absolutely is.

I don’t know why they exist, or what the context of them even is, other than to be aggressively childish. Its like Mr Blobby in snack form.

A dental, vinegary attack

The texture is simultaneously crunchy and chewy, with an alarming tendency to stick to your molars like sugary cement. But somehow that IS part of the charm here, as contrary as that is to my feelings about Wotsits.

There’s no middle ground with Monster Munch. The artificial tang is so pronounced it almost burns, and the onion element has that distinctive processed bite with none of the sweet respite of an actual pickled onion. Maybe its more just pickle brine without the actual onion?

The one redeeming feature I find, and one I perhaps had forgotten, is that they do actually taste of corn, and that’s a good thing. It lends a pleasant balance and reminds you that you are actually eating something that is a viable food product.

File under godknowswhati’mfeeling

These are not sophisticated snacks. They’re not even particularly good snacks by most objective measures.

But they occupy a strange nostalgic niche that defies logic. I loved them. Despite everything, I just couldn’t not.

Nutritional Information (Per 100g)